soulbriety

While we can spiral into overwhelm thinking about all the people who we’ve harmed or have harmed us throughout our lives, there are really 3 basic categories of relationships that are mandatory to heal in order to become our best selves, and in my coaching program, I go in depth with clients to identify specific wounds, and ways to heal them. But for this post, I will share a bit about each, and I hope this sparks some resonance within you to reflect on how each is going in your life:

• Relationship to Self

Definitely a tough repair for many of us, due to years of shame, negative self-talk, inherited limiting beliefs, or maltreatment from others we may have felt we deserved. It may sound cliche, but until we love ourselves, the rest of our healing is going to be insurmountable, and surface-level at best. Here are the key points of focus when repairing our relationship to ourself:

• Forgiveness – going from shame to guilt, and then recognizing we are separate from our past.
• Ownership/Responsibility – seeing the truth of our actions & owning up to them without or justification or avoidance.
• Replacing negative beliefs with positive ones (see reprogramming post)
• Find strengths & purpose – set goals & celebrate effots
• Commit to self (daily intentions, inventory)

• Relationship to Others

We may have lost a lot of trust in active addiction, or we may have little trust for others based upon our beliefs instilled from a traumatic upbringing, but at the end of the day, we are social beings. There are countless studies on connection & how we need it to survive, so healing our relationship with the outside world is vital.

• Forgiving others/Making amends
• Finding empathy (this person hurt me.. I’ve also hurt someone before. This trains your brain to empathize & forgive, seeing them as human with their own protective mechanisms & trauma)
• Releasing control & setting healthy boundaries
• Build community (whether its your family, or a fellowship, or a support group, find something outside of yourself you can find a sense of belonging in)
• Be of service, and learn to accept help from others

• Relationship to Source

Whether you call it “God”, “The Universe”, “Nature”, developing a connection to your Higher Power is absolutely necessary for true recovery & healing. If you don’t have this defined, I have specific tools to help you navigate toward your understanding in my program, but the basics include:

• Practices that help you define who Source is to you
• Make conscious contact daily (prayer, meditation, journaling)
• Practice gratitude, and often! We level up our frequency when we are in a state of gratitude, & attract more of what we desire. We also build more trust in Source through doing this.
• Ask for tools! (Instead of: “please help me get a good grade on my assignment”, try: “please give me the confidence to do well & the acceptance to receive the grade I earn for it”
• Get out in nature! Nothing is a better vessel for spiritual communication that Mama Gaia herself! Even small amounts of time away from technology can boost your awareness & heighten your senses to spiritual direction!
• Trust you are divinely guided and supported: your beliefs are strong! The more certainty you have that you are supported on your journey, the more signs of confirmation you will receive, in turn, heightening your connection to Source!